The Awakening
by CherryWolf-chan
Summary: Mini-Weasley, I do hope you have a bloody good reason as to why you just barged into The Manor at four in the flaming morning and started screeching for my daughter-in-law!


**AN: Fluffy, Fluffy, Fluff, Fluff, Fluff! Thought I'd try something different here. Make Ron the good guy bestie instead of Harry. Tell me what you think!**

 **Pages: 22**

 **Words: 8665**

 **~~Malfoy Manor~~**

 **~~Floo Room~~**

Ron tumbled practically head over heels through the floo into his best friend's house. Before he was even fully out of the fireplace he was screaming his head off.

" **HERMIONE! MIONE! MIONE WHERE THE BLOODY HELL ARE YOU?!** "

Taking another deep breath, he bellowed so hard the elves down in the kitchens thought the manor was caving in. " _ **HERMIONE MALFOY, GET YOUR BUSHY HEAD INTO THE FLOO ROOM RIGHT THIS INSTANT!**_ "

Instead of Hermione, Ron nearly collided with scowling, wand-wielding, dressing gown clad Lucius at the door. "Mini-Weasley, I do hope you have a bloody good reason as to why you just barged into The Manor at four in the fucking morning and started screeching for my daughter-in-law!"

It was then that Hermione ran in, wand in hand and Narcissa at her heels. " **WHAT HAPPENED; WHAT'S GOING ON?! RONALD! WHAT THE BLOODY HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!? ARE YOU AWARE IT'S FOUR IN THE MORNING?!** "

Ron was so worked up, and coupled with screaming for Hermione, he was completely out of breath as he tried to relay his message. "Hermione! Malfoy…he's…Malfoy's awake!"

Slowly, Hermione raised her wand again. "Yes Ronald…I'm aware Lucius is awake. I'm standing next to him. Ronald…would you mind answering a security question…? You're acting rather…odd."

Ron more or less collapsed from exhaustion, still trying to speak. "Mione! Malfoy! Mione!"

Hermione gave him a sceptical look as she glanced at the suspicious looks on her parents-in-law's faces. "Right…Ronald, what was the first time you ever made me cry?"

Ron was starting to calm down by this point, and was highly unamused at the interrogation. "I said something about you not having any friends! But Mione, aren't you wondering why I'm here at four in the morning?!"

Hermione finally lowered her wand. "Yes Ronald, we're all wondering that, seeing as I could barely get you to wake up when we were on the run for our lives, before noon, let alone four."

She opened her mouth to keep talking.

Ron growled in exasperation, got up, grabbed her hand in his, and put the other squarely over her mouth.

"Hermione, I'm going to say this as slowly, and in as little words as possible. Malfoy, your husband, Draco Malfoy, has awakened from his five year long magically induced coma. And he is asking for you."

After saying his peace, Ron blinked his eyes, realizing upon opening them that he held nothing but air in his hands, as he was now the only one in the entire room.

Scowling to himself, he turned back towards the floo. "Bloody Malfoys!"

Pausing, he turned back around. "Tinkle!"

The elf appeared before him, befuddled as to why the redhead was suddenly left alone in the manor, and was now calling on him.

"Tinkle, I need you to make sure everything's okay here. Your master and mistresses Malfoy won't be back for a while."

Tinkle nodded, confused. "May Tinkle ask why sir?"

Ron let out a small smirk. "Draco woke up."

He silently told himself that for the foreseeable future he should refer to Malfoy as Draco, if only to alleviate the wands and interrogation he'd just had to go through because Hermione thought he was acting crazy.

He stepped through the Floo, grinning at the ecstatic sounds now emanating from the just-silent manor.

 _Bloody Malfoy; leave it to him to take a five year nap, and still manage to kick up a fuss like I've never seen before._

But in his heart, he knew he was more ecstatic than anyone could possibly imagine.

He smirked to himself again.

 _Just wait till the poor bastard finds out._

 **~~St. Mungo's Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries~~**

Ron stepped through the Floo, and made his way up to the private Auror wing of the hospital. Once there, he was met by the surprising sight of Hermione still standing outside her husband's hospital room, looking a nervous wreck, as Harry seemed to be trying unsuccessfully to placate her.

He made his way over to her. "Mione, why are you still out here? What with you disappearing _**as**_ I blinked, I would have thought you'd be in there lecturing the poor git's ear off already!"

Completely ignoring Harry, who seemed more than a little put out, she turned to Ron. "Ron…what if…what if he doesn't remember me? Remember us?"

Ron gave her an exasperated look. "Mione, what part of 'He's asking for you', did you not understand?"

Then she suddenly got a horrified look on her face. "What if he thinks he hates me again?!"

Ron glared at her. "Right Mione, because that's what fifteen year old Draco Malfoy would do, after waking up confused in a hospital bed. Demand to know where the bloody fuck 'Granger' was, because he felt the sudden, inexplicable urge to call her a Mudblood. Now stop being stupid and come on."

Grabbing her by the wrist, he threw open Draco's door and dragged her in to join Draco and his parents.

Turning her reluctant face on the bed in the room, Hermione just stood there and stared at her husband with a grimace.

He, on the other hand, looked down right ecstatic to see her. That is, until he noticed her expression. Seeing the change in their son's demeanour, Lucius and Narcissa volunteered to leave the room so he and his wife could get reacquainted. Ron had to peel Hermione's fingers off his arm, but he left with them, softly shutting the door behind him.

That left Hermione standing at the doorway, staring at her husband, who in turn was staring at her.

It was Hermione who finally broke the silence. "So…how do you feel?"

Draco shrugged, glancing at his hands. "Alright I guess. Well, I feel as well as anyone who woke up from a five year coma to a wife who doesn't seem to be particularly thrilled at the prospect."

Hermione was quick to stride over and refute his claim as she settled herself at the foot of his bed. "No, no! Of course I'm happy, over the moon really, that you're awake. It's just…"

Draco suddenly paled. "You're not…with someone else, are you? I mean I would…understand, er well I'd try to anyway. After all, it has been five years, and you never knew if I was going to wake. And you always did have more… _needs_ , than the average woman."

Hermione crossed her arms and glared. "If you're quite through Malfoy, then you should probably know that, no, there was never anyone else."

He leaned back against his pillow. "But you were just clinging to Weasel earlier. Are you sure you don't have a thing? Don't worry, you can tell me! I'll not be mad; I may break the blighter's nose, but I promise to do my best not to be mad at you."

Hermione raised her voice at this, poking her finger at him. "First of all, stop being a drama queen! You and I both know that if I'd actually moved on, then you'd be blowing half the city up. And, point of fact, if there's any _one_ person who you _shouldn't_ be accusing of anything, it's Ron!"

He scowled at her. "What the bloody hell does that mean?!"

She sighed. "First, answer something for me. You do in fact remember me, and that we love each other, and that we're married. Right?"

He deadpanned at her. "Well yeah Granger. Wait. That's why you're acting odd? What the hell is wrong with-"

At that she launched herself on top of him, connecting their lips and kissing him with all the emotion she had pent up for the last half-decade.

They didn't break apart until the Mediwizard ran in frantically, stopping dead at the sight of their passionate embrace.

Draco scowled at the man. "What the bloody hell mate?! First bit of action I get in five years, and you just fucking interrupted it!"

The Mediwizard, who Draco recognized as Marcus Flint, raised an eyebrow. "Sorry Malfoy. I just ran in like a _maniac_ because alarms went off as you, seemingly, stopped breathing."

He gave Hermione a pointed look, and she blushed.

Marcus soon left, leaving Hermione lying in her husband's arms.

Draco looked down at her. "So now tell me. Why is Weasel the one person I should be least pissed at about anything?"

Hermione hummed as she drew circles on his chest with her finger. "Don't you remember how you ended up getting captured in the first place?"

Draco shrugged. "I don't know. The last thing I remember is duelling Yaxley."

Hermione shuddered, hugging him closer. "Right. But right as you disarmed and tied him up; you looked over and saw Dolohov about to shoot at Ron's back as he duelled with Avery. You tackled him out of the way and took the brunt of the Crucio meant for Ron. By then it was obvious they were losing, so they took you, and apparated."

He brushed away the tears on her face as she continued. "Once they had you back at Dolohov Manor they tortured you so…so, so much. Ron and Harry busted you out a few days later, but the damage was practically beyond hope. You were completely catatonic. Marcus, who's the specialist in such cases, said it was a small wonder you weren't a drooling, babbling, mess."

She gave him a watery smile as she kept going. "Admittedly, I was most certainly not in my right mind myself. At that proclamation I had to be held back by Lucius from attacking Marcus. I more or less growled at him that Malfoy's did not babble, and they most certainly wouldn't do anything as unseemly as drooling."

Draco had a laugh at that, and Hermione only clutched him tighter. He nails were digging into him rather uncomfortably, but he wasn't about to complain. "So then Marcus said the only thing they could do was put you in a magically induced coma so your body and mind could have uninterrupted time to heal. It wasn't for sure, and it was entirely possible you could never wake up if the damage was too far gone. But we had to try. And the rest is, more or less, history."

Draco hugged her to him. "I still can't believe it. Five years where you had no idea if I'd ever wake up, and you still held a torch for me. But still, what's the big deal with Weasel?"

Hermione sat up and looked at him. "Ronald felt absolutely awful that you got hurt saving him. He's been a rock to me these last years. Hell, he had a bedroom at The Manor the first year after you went under; he still stays there around the weeks that are especially hard for us; the day you were put under, our anniversary, your birthday, my birthday, your parents' and Sco-ther things."

Draco could only watch her, slack jawed. "I'd wake up screaming in the night and he'd comfort me. When I had…other things going on…he was the one who took care of it all. He did things around The Manor; he helped Lucius part-time with what would have been your role in the company. He even spent time gardening with Narcissa. Ronald completely blamed himself for what we were missing out on. So he did, still does in fact, his best to be a stand-in Draco Malfoy until you woke up."

Draco finally found his voice. "But…but you didn't know if I would ever wake up..."

Hermione shook her head. "Ron did. No matter which of us it was having a tantrum, or pity party, and wondering 'what if', he always shut it down and declared that you were most definitely going to wake up. According to him, "Bloody Malfoy will wake up, if for no other reason than to hold it over my head for the rest of my life, that he saved my miserable existence.""

Draco smirked, and Hermione mirrored him. "Yes, he got rather good at that smirk too."

Draco dragged her back into his arms. "Not that I'm not eternally grateful to the bastard, but where the hell was ruddy Potter all this time? You make it sound like he was completely useless."

Hermione scowled. "Harry was not quite as…optimistic as Ronald. Eventually Ron was the one who banned Harry from The Manor, and from seeing me. Every time I or Ron would bring up how great it would be when you wake up, or what life would be like after, Harry always came in with how you were probably not going to wake up. He insisted I shouldn't get my hopes up."

Draco glowered towards the closed door. "Fucking Potter; show's what he knows!"

Hermione glared at the door herself. "Indeed. It only increased the aversion I had to him and his little wife, when they started trying to push me to move on and date not a full month after you had been hospitalized. They once showed up with Cormac McLaggen, ready for a blind date. And, if you can imagine this, bloody McLaggen was absolutely _distressed_ on my _behalf_ that they were trying to make me date so soon after my husband was injured. He gave them an earful even I was proud of, gave me a hug, and left. Can you even imagine? _McLaggen_ has more sense than the two of them put _together_."

Draco raised an eyebrow. "Potter is un-fucking-believable."

Hermione shook her head. "And this kept happening. No matter how many times I told them that I didn't want to date, and even _if_ you never woke up, I was content to be left to my own devices, to decide _myself_ if and when I would ever date again. No matter how many times Ron talked to them about leaving me alone. They just kept pushing. The last straw that made Ron ban them was when Ginny not-so-subtly suggested that I should either shack up with Ron, if we weren't already shagging, or stop leading him on. His living with and taking care of me and your parents was setting off signals in her head apparently."

Draco snorted in disgust. "Of that I have no doubt. There's not much else in her head to set off."

Hermione sighed. "Even after they were banned, they kept harassing me about dating other people through the post, and whenever I would see them out in Diagon Alley, or at Ron's place. Suffice to say, my clostest friends now, other than Ron, and a select few Weasleys, are all of your old friends."

Draco smirked. "So my friends never doubted my awakening?"

Hermione shook her head. "Not once. They were as enthusiastic as Ronald about Malfoys persevering, and you waking up, if only to hold your heroics over Ron's head. In fact, they were so certain-although it may have in part been to discredit the Potters- that you have five weddings to attend, in probably the near future, which they insisted they couldn't have without you as part of the wedding party. Their parents were less than amused."

Draco looked at her, shocked. "Weddings? Five of them? Who? _To_ who? What the hell?"

Hermione started ticking them off. "Well, you're to be Blaise' best man; he's marrying Luna Lovegood. You'll also be Theo's best man; he's marrying Tracy Davies. Malcolm Baddock's groomsman at his wedding to Adrian Pucey; they had to flip a coin, and yes it was as much a surprise to all of us as it is to you. You're to be Pansy's man of honour at her wedding to George Weasley; I believe that one was more of a shock than Malcolm and Adrian could ever hope to be. And lastly you're Astoria's bridesman at her wedding to Charlie Weasley. I'll say it for you; everyone else already did. What a lucky bitch, that one."

Draco could do nothing but stare at his wife, jaw open. "Bloody hell."

Hermione grinned. "Yes, that's what Ronald said too. Oh wait, speaking of Ron, make that six weddings as of recently. He's a bit more traditional than to make me his best woman, so he'd like for you to be his best man."

Draco ran a hand over his face. "Dare I even ask who Weasley is getting married to?"

Hermione giggled. "Gabrielle Delacour."

Draco raised a brow. "Well bloody done to Weasel."

 **~~Five Minutes Earlier~~**

 **~~Malfoy Manor~~**

 **~~The Nursery~~**

A young boy, no more than five yawned as he sat up in his bed. Looking around, he decided it was the perfect time to wake up his mummy, so they could make breakfast together.

Crawling out of his bed, and grabbing his favourite stuffed toys, he padded out of his room, across the hall to find his mummy's bedroom door flung wide, her covers mussed, and her, as well as her wand, missing. This wasn't normal. His mummy had never gone downstairs for breakfast without informing him! And Merlin help the day she knowingly left her bed in shambles!

Something bad had to have happened! She must have been kidnapped by Death Eaters! Or eaten by a Basilisk! Or…or…or even worse; what if Uncle Harry had succeeded in forcing her to go out with another wizard?!

No. Absolutely not. That was one hundred percent not allowed. In fact he required, no demanded, right this instant, the presence of his-

" _ **MUMMY!**_ "

The boy heard a pop and turned, only to see his favourite house elf. "Tinkle! I want my mummy! Where is she?!"

Tinkle tried to placate the child. "Young Master Malfoy, your mummy needed to go out. She be back later. Would you like cookies?"

The child scowled, reminding the elf of another little boy with that exact scowling face. "No! I demand you tell me where my mummy is! I know you have to! Because I'm a Malfoy and you gots to do what I say!"

Tinkle stared ruefully at the child, and conceded defeat. "Young Master Malfoy has awakened."

The child crossed his chubby arms and raised a brow. "Yes. I am awake, Tinkle. Now answer my question."

Realizing the problem, Tinkle rectified it. "What Tinkle means to say is the old Young Master Malfoy, your father, Master Draco has awakened."

The boy's jaw hit the floor, as he started bouncing in excitement. "My daddy woke up?! Tinkle, I demand you take me to him now, please!"

The elf had no choice but to obey, but shook his head at the child all the same. Only the child of Hermione Granger and Draco Malfoy could _demand_ something, _please_.

 _Tinkle should remind the others that the old Young Master Malfoy is now Master Draco. Too much confusion already._

 **~~St. Mungo's Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries~~**

 **~~Outside Draco's Hospital Room~~**

The gathered party turned at the sound of a pop, only to find the Malfoy house elf with a familiar child in his arms.

Lucius scowled as the boy was put down. "Tinkle, what is the meaning of this?! You should know better than to bring him here."

He looked expectantly at the elf, but his response came from the child now hugging his knee. "He _had_ to bring me here Grandpa! I _demanded_ him to, and then he tried to distract me with cookies, but I remembered him that I'm a Malfoy and he gots to do what I say."

There was a collective thud as everyone in attendance facepalmed at the child. Lucius was reduced to one sentence. "You _reminded_ him, and he _has_ to do what you say."

The child nodded. "Now where's my daddy?! I demand to see him!"

Unfortunately, the occupants of the hallway were not house elves.

Harry attempted to diffuse the situation. "Now, now, your daddy just woke up. He'll want to spend time with your mummy, and he doesn't even know about you yet. You don't want to scare him."

First mistake.

The child glared at Harry. "Malfoys are not afraid of anything!"

Harry gave an exasperated sigh, and his voice took on the slightest rude tone. "You're still not allowed to go in."

Second mistake.

Up until this point, they had been talking in relatively calm voices. But at the declaration that he wasn't allowed to see his very own daddy, the child's patience snapped.

Wait for it…

 **~~Inside Draco's Hospital Room~~**

After their conversation about weddings, the couple had been content to sit in silence. One of them thanking Merlin a thousand times over that he had been given a second chance, and the other trying to figure out how the hell to tell him the one key piece of information she'd thus far omitted.

Turns out, she didn't need to think so hard.

Out of nowhere, the din outside the room silenced, and clear as a bell, one sentence rang out.

" _ **My daddy will hear about this!"**_

Draco slowly turned shocked eyes on his wife, who was massaging her temples. "Granger…what the hell did you do?!"

She just groaned.

" _ **And now that he's awake he really will actually hear about it! And he'll break your glasses, and give you another scar to match the one Voddymort gave you!**_ "

Draco looked like he'd swallowed his tongue, and his wife could only shake her head and wonder why the world was against her.

It was at that moment that the raging child flung his open palmed hand at the door and shouted. "ALO-MORA!"

Apparently there was a considerable amount of magic packed into the tiny little body, because the door opened with a bang at the boy's anger.

He turned back as he crossed the threshold. "And stay away from my mummy too, Potty! Just _wait_ until my daddy hears about all the dates you tried to make Mummy go on!"

And with that he slammed the door closed.

Remembering himself, he turned back to his parents, realizing he had yet to make his introduction.

Bowing to his father, who looked like he was about to have a seizure, the child made his stuffed toys', and his own introductions. "Good morning father, it's a pleasure to finally meet you. This is Crabbe, and this is Goyle. And I'm Malfoy; Scorpius Malfoy."

Hermione snorted. As did someone on the other side of the door who had clearly been listening; her money was on Ronald.

Draco continued to stare, and the child kept going. "Well, rather it's Scorpius Draconis Hyperion Malfoy. But only mummy calls me that, and only when she finds out I filched cookies. If she doesn't find out than I don't get in trouble."

And with that he smirked expectantly at his father.

As the seconds ticked by, Scorpius' expression began to fall, fearing he'd made a bad first impression for the first time in his life, and the only time it ever really mattered.

Hermione elbowed her husband. "Merlin, would you say something?! He practically hero worships you and you're going to make him cry if he thinks you don't like him!"

In sync, both blonds turned to her. "Malfoys don't cry."

She glared at her husband. "Stop patronizing me, and talk to your son!"

Draco whipped back around to stare at Scorpius in awe. "Son…I have a son…"

Scorpius raised a brow at his mother. "Mummy, are you sure _you_ weren't pattern-icing me when you told me daddy was almost as smart as you? He doesn't seem very bright."

Hermione smirked. "That's _patronizing_ baby. And he is. He just needs time for it to sink in; I hadn't exactly gotten around to telling him you existed yet. Now come on, sit up here with us."

He came over and stretched his arms up for her to lift him onto the bed. That was when he remembered something. "Oh yeah!"

He stood on the bed, legs apart, and hands on his hips, looking intently at his mother. "Herminey Jean Malfoy! How dare you abdomen a underage wizard in a ginormous manor with no big people superstition! That was very, very, very, very, very, un-responsible of you! You didn't even make you bed!"

Pulling the little bundle of scowls into her lap, she cuddled him. "I'm so, very sorry your Royal Highness. It'll never happen again; but you can understand that I was really quite excited that your daddy was awake."

He gave her a sheepish look. "Yeah. I understand. I still have to say sorry to Tinkle. I demanded that he tell me where you were, and then to bring me here. And I reminded him he had to do what I say because I'm a Malfoy. I said remembered before, but Grandpa Lucius said it's reminded."

She raised an eyebrow. "Yes, you will most certainly apologize, and Grandpa Lucius was quite right. Also, it was _Hermione_ , _abandon an_ underage wizard, without _supervision_ , and it was _ir_ responsible."

He nodded, turning back to his father. "Okay mummy. Daddy, are you done sinking -yet?"

He continued to stare at his father as he nodded at his mother's voice. "That's _letting it sink in_ , sweetheart."

Draco nodded tentatively. "I'm getting there…just…wow. I can't believe I'm a father."

Hermione rued to herself. _Well, at least he doesn't look terrified of Scorpius anymore._

Now he was looking at him in wonder. "Granger…am I allowed to touch him?"

Scorpius did one better than that, and climbed from his mummy's lap into his daddy's. "I'm your son daddy; of course you're allowed to touch me; that was a stupid question. And why do you call my mummy Granger?"

Draco timidly put a hand on his son's head. "Well…it was her last name when I fell in love with her, before we got married; it's what I've always called her."

Scorpius looked at his father, scandalized. "Mummy had another last name before she married you?! Mummy! How could you not tell me that?! I thought I was your baby!"

Draco stared helplessly at his wife. "Granger, are you sure you had a part in making him? From what I've seen thus far, he might as well be my clone…well except the vocabulary…thing."

Hermione sighed. "Yes, that's what everyone thinks. But just wait until he starts…"

Scorpius suddenly jumped up, nearly squishing a very important appendage. "Daddy! What's your favourite book?! Mine's Hogwarts a History; did you know it details the entire history of Hogwarts ever since it was found? It was found by Godic Giffindor, Salazar Slytherin, Rona Ravencaw, and Hegga Huff'n'puff. Did you know they made four houses in Hogwarts, named after each of them? Mummy's read it to me at least a million times!"

"…that."

Draco suddenly, once again, looked terrified of the boy. "He's not going to deck me in the nose, too, is he?"

Hermione gave him a withering stare. "No, but did you notice that the only name he got right was Slytherin's? That would be your father's doing. I've given up on correcting it at this point. He can see for himself when he goes to Hogwarts. And dear, they didn't find the school in the middle of nowhere in the Scottish Highlands; they _founded_ it; that means they created it."

Nodding, he questioned Draco again. "Daddy, wait until you hear about all the bad stuff that you heard about while you were sleeping!"

Finally coming around to being a rational adult, Draco got a bit more comfortable, putting his arm around Hermione, and giving the child in his lap his undivided attention.

"How often did you visit me to tell me things Scorpius?"

He grinned, and Draco noticed his front two teeth were missing. "Every day, five times a day, ever since I was three, and I found out I could tattle to you about everything bad that happens!"

Draco looked at Hermione. "Five…times a day?"

She rolled her eyes. "Five times a day; one time with me, one time with Lucius and Narcissa, one time with Ron, one time with Blaise and Theo, and one time with Pansy, Astoria, Charlie and George. He'd even squeeze in a sixth with Tinkle if someone did something extra naughty that couldn't wait until the next day for you to hear about."

Draco awed. "That…is some crazy dedication to the cause. So what were most of the bad things that I heard about?"

Scorpius scowled at him. "Uncle Harry, or the Boy Who Lived to Annoy Mummy as Grandpa calls him, and Auntie Ginny, who's a busybody ninny as Grandma calls her, always try to make mummy go out with other wizards, which would be cheating on you-her _husband_ , thank you very much! That's the 'jority of the bad things."

Having caught on to the trend, Draco corrected him. "That's majority…Scorpius."

As his brain finally came to terms with the idea that he had a child, Draco recalled something his son had said earlier. "Scorpius…son…what did you say were your toys' names?"

To Draco's unending horror, the child held up two stuffed Death Eaters. "Crabbe and Goyle! I also have a limidition Death Eater Grandpa at home! And I also have all five plantation, Draco Malfoys that were ever created."

Hermione chuckled at her husband, who couldn't even speak. "That's limited edition, and platinum edition."

Draco looked to Hermione helplessly. "Who the hell decided it would be a good idea to mass market Death Eater merchandise to children?!"

Hermione gave him a sheepish look. "Well…me actually. But your father was the one who funded it!"

Seeing his look she shrugged. "Well it was like a way to cope with everything; you wouldn't believe our sales if I showed you the numbers. We have voodoo dolls, blow-up dolls, dart boards…and the children's stuffed ones were done in collaboration with George. They do…notably un-pureblooded things."

Draco massaged his temples. "And what may I ask is that?"

Hermione shrugged, looking at their son playing with Crabbe. "They pass gas, act as whoopee cushions, spew various…paraphernalia out their mouths if you squeeze them. And their clothes can change into anything the child thinks up. Lucius has since kept his stuffie behind glass ever since he walked in on Scorpius giving him pigtails and a tutu."

Draco looked like he didn't know whether to laugh or cry. "But…what did the others all think of this?"

She shrugged. "They thought it was a riot. Ronald has a Bellatrix dartboard in his office…actually that's our most popular piece; more so than the Voldemort one. Really the only ones who didn't find it hilarious were the Potters. But you know how Harry gets his panties in a twist whenever he's not the center of attention. Everyone else thinks they're amazing coping mechanisms; the Death Eater Dolly's are the number one recommendation by leading psychiatrists to treat PTSD due to The War."

She suddenly got a maniacal grin on her face. "Although, I believe Ginny forgot that it's me who does sales and marketing. I couldn't help but notice someone's Gringotts transaction in my ledger when they decided to buy a fully functioning Rodolphus Lestrange blow-up doll. Seems a certain someone might not be as fabulous as he thought he was."

Draco matched her grin, and leaned down to whisper, mindful of the tiny ears in the room. "Say Granger…I don't suppose _you_ made use of any Draco Malfoy blow-up dolls whilst I was in a coma?"

Hermione winked saucily. "It was you who suggested I had more needs than the average woman; not me. But there is, and will only ever be, _one_ Draco Malfoy doll, and it is safely in my custody."

He smirked. "It's still twisted Granger."

She leaned in to whisper. "If I set it to snarky, it even calls me a filthy little Mudblood."

Deciding to change the subject, lest he be forced to kick his son out, Draco diverted his attention away from his wife. "So Scorpius, tell me how you like your Uncle…Ronald."

The boy instantly forgot his toys and turned his attention to his father. "Uncle Ron is the bestest! He does everything with me; when you were sleeping he even brought me here and played Wizard's Chess-he taught me to play- with me every Father's Day because I'd get sad without you. Uncle Ron also takes me flying, and he bought me my first broom; the MiniBolt 3000! And he taught me how to fly it, oh and how to walk! And he takes care of mummy when she cries; but she's allowed to cry because she wasn't born a Malfoy! And he broke Uncle Harry's face when Uncle Harry told me my pratty Malfoy tantrums were the reason my mummy was matzah-ball and I was the reason she couldn't forget you and move on. After Uncle Ron broke his face, mummy broke Uncle's Harry's private parts with her pointy shoe. And I dunno how, but I think she managed to break his voice too when she broke his privates. Oh! And Uncle Ron sneaks me cookies when mummy is out of the room; but don't tell her! We'll both get in trouble!"

The last part was (very loudly) whispered, but Hermione could only smile at him. "Sweetheart, Uncle Ron is the _best_ , I was _miserable_ , and you _don't know_ how. Speaking of Uncle Ron, why don't you go out and tell everyone they can come in, in another ten minutes? I'm sure they're not too pleased at my hogging daddy."

Scorpius nodded, launching off the bed and running out of the room.

Draco sighed, looking at his wife. "I'm immeasurably grateful to Weasley for everything he's done; he definitely wasn't obliged to do any of it. But I can't help but be…jealous of everything he got to do with _my_ son. All the firsts that I'll never get back, that I should be thankful he did for me, I'm still jealous of them."

Hermione hugged him close. "There are still a multitude of firsts that you'll get, and you can get a glimpse into the less than glamorous firsts poor Ron endured when I was pregnant, and in the early years, when we have more. And rest assured; we _will_ have more. And there's something else he did for you."

Draco looked at her, nonplussed. "What's that?"

She smiled up at him. "He never stepped back from a chance to tell Scorpius what a great man you are, and how when you woke up you would be the absolute best father in the world. How, as much as Ron loved him and loved to do things _with_ him, his father would be infinite times as much fun, and love him tens of thousands of times more than he did. He told him how courageous and loyal you are-and to not let you know he said that because you'd punch him-, and how much you were willing to do for someone you loved; that you were the best man he knew."

Draco continued to listen, shocked. "He even told him it was his fault you were in a coma, because you were such a good friend to him that you saved his life, and took a curse meant for him. Ronald always made a point to never upstage you to Scorpius; to never let Scorpius place him as a father-figure because he knew, more than all of us he _knew_ , that you would wake up one day. That's why Scorpius was rearing to meet you so badly; why he wasn't hesitant or shy or anything about you. Because he loves Ron and there's no one Ron speaks more highly of than you. Ronald made sure your son grew up loving you. He did that while Narcissa and I could barely bring up your name without crying, and Lucius got all broody and cantankerous when your name came up."

It was then that everyone decided to enter the room. Draco took one look at Ron, and with no beating around the bush, proceeded to inform him. "Weas…Ronald, I've decided that, to show my thanks for everything you'd done for my family while I was unavailable, I'm going to pay for your wedding, and buy you your first marital home. No complaining, no bargaining, and certainly no ifs, ands, or buts. You and your Missus simply decide what you want, and how you want it; no matter what it is. And I will foot the bill."

Hermione couldn't help but smirk as she noticed the green monster of jealousy peeking out from behind Ginny's eyes.

Ron scoffed. "Malfoy, I'm the one indebted to you! I did what I did because you couldn't and I was making it up to your family that I was the reason. I refuse to let you pay for my wedding, and most certainly not my house."

Draco scowled at the man. "Ronald, I demand you cease arguing, and simply start circling things in catalogues with your fiancée."

Ron rubbed the back of his head. "You, and your son, and your demands. This is not the end of this conversation Malfoy."

Draco raised a brow. "It is if you don't want me to sic mother on your wedding."

Ron stopped. "…we'll come back to this later. So how are you feeling? And why are you calling me Ronald?!"

Narcissa smirked primly at his not-so-subtle change in subject, already plotting. _Gardenias for the bouquet I think, and a colour scheme of mauve and ecru. Oh! And the bridesmaid's dresses simply must be no longer than knee-length if this is to be a spring affair. I wonder if I could put a rush order on those silver roses the Delacours liked so much at Draco's wedding. Hm…_

Entirely aware of his mother's scheming, Draco shrugged, picking Scorpius up off the floor and placing him back in his lap. "Well after everything you've done I can't, in good conscious call you Weasel, now can I? And Ronald _is_ your name, is it not?"

He screwed up his face. "I feel like I'm being reprimanded by my mother, or worse, by Mione. Call me Ron, or go back to Weasel…Ronald makes me think of homework, exams, and de-gnoming the garden."

Hermione glared at him, but didn't say anything, instead moving to glare at the dark-haired man behind Ron. "What are you still doing here?"

He tried to smile at her, while his wife gave her a sour look. "Well now that Malfoy is awake, I thought we could let bygones be bygones."

It was Draco who answered with a snort. "Not bloody likely. What the hell is wrong with you Potter? Just because you're 'The Chosen One' doesn't mean you shouldn't learn to leave well enough alone when you're clearly not wanted."

It was Harry's turn to snort. "Right Malfoy, because you _would_ have preferred she spent the rest of her life pining away for you in that musty old manor. Never dating, never happy, and never remarrying; just holding onto the hope that maybe one day you'd wake up."

Hermione launched off her bed, poking Harry in the chest repeatedly. "Actually, the very first thing Draco said when he saw my hesitancy was that I could tell him if I had moved on, and that he wouldn't be mad, or blame me. So, no Harry; that is entirely _not_ what he wanted."

Draco piped up from his place on the bed, playing with Scorpius' hair. "And if in fact she had remarried, I would have been put out; hell I probably would have initially tried to blow the bastard up, but I would have gotten over it. But only if she herself had moved on in her own time and fallen in love again. If I woke up to her in a loveless relationship because _you_ , her supposed _best friend_ , had a complex about trying to save people who didn't want to be saved, I would have turned you inside out myself."

Harry opened his mouth, but Draco cut him off. "And _don't_ admonish me for petty threats. I do in fact have a spell for that in my arsenal."

An affronted Ginny took over for her husband. "How dare you speak to him like that?! After all he tried to do for Hermione!"

Draco raised an eyebrow. "Oh, do forgive my thoughtlessness. You're right. I mean after all, he helped her grieve, and looked after her and my parents, helped her through pregnancy, and has more or less been raising my child. Oh. Wait. That was Ronald. Sorry, my mistake. Thanks for trying to force my wife on blind dates even _Cormac McLaggen_ thought were a tasteless idea, Potter. I sure owe you one."

At least Harry had the good grace to look embarrassed, but Ginny kept ploughing through, offended as ever. "Harry was only trying to help her move on!"

Draco barely glanced at her. "You don't even get to speak. This from a woman who's buying fully functioning Rodolphus Lestrange blow-up dolls for her pleasures. Potter you better be bloody grateful it was me instead of you. From what I'm hearing you'd have been replaced within a matter of weeks."

Ginny looked outraged. "He would not! And I would never do anything so uncivilized as to buy a blow-up doll-let alone a Rodolphus Lestrange one!"

This time it was Ron who replied. "Well you thought Mione was good and ready to shack up with the next bloke who walked by in a matter of weeks. Clearly that says something about you. And don't you lie; Mione showed me the sales invoice."

Harry could only look on in confusion as his wife and her brother raged at each other. "That's only because Hermione's husband is a good-for-nothing Death Eater, and _my_ husband is The Boy Who Lived! And showing you that invoice is a breach of confidentiality on Hermione's part; I'll be taking legal action of course."

Molly finally spoke up, looking like she was going to strangle her daughter. "That good-for-nothing Death Eater _saved_ your _brother's_ _life_ you half-witted girl! You should be falling to his feet in thanks!"

Ron was right behind his mother. "And it's not illegal for her to show me transactions that were made to _my own Gringotts account_ Ginny. In fact, using my account without my permission to keep Harry from finding out about your fetishes is considered fraud. I should be taking you to the Wizengamot."

Ginny's hair was practically standing on end in her anger. "Come Harry! Clearly we're not wanted here!"

With that she gripped his wrist and apparated both of them out of the room.

Ron whirled on Draco. "How'd you do that?! I've been trying to get them to kick themselves out of a room for years, and you just did it in less than fifteen minutes! What the hell Malfoy?!"

Draco smirked. "It's a gift."

Hermione raised an unimpressed eyebrow. "Yes. A Malfoy has the innate ability to clear a room with a single word."

Scorpius chimed in from his place in his father's lap. "We're like a family of Supermans!"

Draco looked to his wife in confusion. "Now what the bloody hell is a Superman?"

It was Ron who answered, with a smirk. "Oh Malfoy. The things we have to catch you up on."

 **~~Three Days Later~~**

 **~~St. Mungo's Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries~~**

 **~~Lobby~~**

Draco had spent the last three days getting reacquainted with his wife and getting to know both his son, as well as Uncle Ron. And to the unending horror of his thirteen year old self…he and Ron hit it off like they'd been friends all their lives.

"Bite me."

"No thanks Malfoy; I'll leave that to Hermione."

Draco glowered at the redhead from his stretcher. "I'm serious Ronald. I'm not getting into a wheelchair. It's completely undignified."

Ron looked like he was in pain, having been listening to this for the last hour. "You don't get a choice, and _I'm_ serious Malfoy. If you don't stop calling me Ronald I'll make sure you never get _out_ of that wheelchair."

Draco glared. "Why can't I just bloody walk to the floo? Or better yet, why can't I just apparate?!"

It was his mini-me, sitting at the foot of his bed who answered. "Because daddy, you were sleeping for lots of years and you don't gots enough strongness in your legs to walk yet. And you're too weak to appetite; by yourself or side-long. You run the risk of spinaching yourself. And spinach is super yucky!"

It was Ron who corrected him without missing a beat. "That's _have_ enough _strength_. _Apparate_ , side- _along_ and _splinch_ ; spinach is the yucky vegetable."

Draco gave up, scowling. Clearly they were all against him. Even his heir. "Seriously Ronald. I don't get how the kid can structure sentences better than you ever could, but he uses the wrong words!"

Ron shrugged, not pushing the name anymore for now. "He's around Mione, and your lot all day. What did you expect? Her and your parents talk all uppity and posh with their sentence structure, and Scorpius mimics it. He just ends up using words he knows in places of similar sounding words he doesn't know. And he has the occasional incorrect word conjugation. All in all, I still think he wins over at least all the Hogwarts first and second years. At least."

Draco smirked. "Well he _is_ a Malfoy."

Scorpius raised his nose proudly. "And Malfoys are always the best and always deserve the best!"

Hermione came up with Draco's discharge papers, rolling her eyes. "Oh, not this again."

Ron smirked at her. "And you're the one who has to live with it. Well, I'll see you guys tomorrow."

Scorpius turned tearing eyes on his uncle. "Uncle Ron. You're not going to come home with us? But we just got daddy back! You're not jelly are you? Don't worry! Just because I love daddy doesn't mean I don't love you too!"

Ron waved his arms at the child. "No, no Scorpius! Of course I'm coming with you! I just…meant I'll see you all at the breakfast table in the morning…because I'm going right to my room to sleep! …and that's jealous."

Sufficiently placated, Scorpius went back to his Death Eater plushies, not a single tear in sight.

Draco deadpanned. "Seriously Ronald? If Snape had been like you, I would have owned his soul by the time I was Scorpius' age. Do you have no fortitude?"

Hermione raised a brow as they made their way to the floo. "From what Narcissa tells me, you may as well have owned everyone's souls. The only ones who could get you to do as you were told were the House Elves ironically enough."

Draco had nothing to say to that, and they made their way into the floo and through to Malfoy Manor.

 **~~Malfoy Manor~~**

 **~~Den~~**

After being ambushed by practically every one of his House Elves, Draco finally settled into his favourite loveseat with his wife, and took in his home.

There was one thing in particular that he noticed was a new addition.

Added to the family portraits, baby pictures, wedding pictures, and friends' pictures were shots of both Scorpius and Ron in equal amounts.

"Wow. My parents practically adopted you, didn't they Ronald?"

It was Lucius who answered, entering the room with his wife. "Practically nothing. Ronald has his own trust fund."

Narcissa sniffed. "Which he refuses to touch. It's quite annoying."

Ron threw his hand up in exasperation. "I told you a thousand times! I'm not accepting your money for doing the right thing!"

Lucius sniffed. "Fine, boy. Have it your way. We'll stop insisting on the matter."

Ron didn't trust the gleam in Lucius' eye one fucking bit.

"Right…why don't I believe that?"

Lucius shrugged nondescriptly. "I just figured if you really loved and respected us as much as your own parents-like you claim, you' accept this gift from us."

Draco snorted at his father's antics.

Narcissa chimed in. "Yes, I suppose you just don't think we measure up to Molly and Arthur."

Hermione raised an eyebrow, and whispered to her husband. "Aren't they laying it on a bit thick?"

Draco smirked. "Just watch."

Ron stuttered. "I-I didn't mean to hurt your feelings! It just doesn't seem right to take money from you! I wouldn't even take money from my own parents. The occasional gift is one thing but-"

Narcissa jumped. "Oh, so you would still accept 'the occasional' gift from us? Marvellous!"

Draco snickered. "Here comes funny."

Lucius called out. "Tinkle!"

Tinkle appeared, looking imploringly at his master. "Tinkle would you please go down to Diagon Alley and ask to have the Cirrus X sent to the residence of Ronald Weasley? Tell them to put it on my tab."

Ron shook his head. "That is much too expensive, and besides. It's not out on the market yet."

Lucius shrugged. "This is the only non-holiday related gift I've gotten you in five years. If that's not occasional I don't know what is. And I have a standing reservation for all new merchandise before it goes out. I usually use my reservation for Draco, but since he's indisposed, I'm getting it for you…son."

What was Ron supposed to say to that?

Narcissa came in next. "And don't worry. My gift won't cost a dime. I'm going to help plan your entire wedding! It was Draco's idea, but it is brilliant. Minimal stress for you and the next Mrs. Weasley."

Ron opened his mouth. "Oh, you really don't have to-"

Then Draco chimed in. "That reminds me! Considering I've missed 5 years' worth of birthdays and Christmases, I don't see why two gifts from me would be considered anything _but_ occasional. One Malfoy-style wedding, and one house in the country, coming up! Oh, make it two and a half! I'm footing the honeymoon as well."

Ron opened his mouth.

Draco continued. "It's the least I can do for the brother I've always wanted!"

Ron closed his mouth.

Hermione let out a loud belly-laugh. "That's what happens when you're a sentimental sod Ronald. You get played by Malfoys."

Ron snorted. "This from the girl who went campaigning for House Elves, and in the process practically made them more terrified of her than their masters."

Hermione glared. "There's a difference between being sentimental and being compassionate!"

Scorpius ran up to Ron. "I wanna give you an occasion gift too Uncle Ron! Here, you can have one of my plat-num 'dition daddys!"

Ron laughed. "Now that, I will accept most graciously. And that's occasion _al_ and platinum edition. I wonder how Malfoy would look in my Yule Ball dress robes…"

Draco raised a brow. "Oh mother…do you suppose Gabrielle would like for her wedding to be in our back garden? That way we can have the peacocks there! Doves are for cheapskates."

Hermione grinned. "The Potters had doves, you know."

Draco nodded. "I remember. And it reinforces my point. Peacocks! Oh, and we can bring in the platinum roses the Delacours liked at our wedding!"

Narcissa nodded. "Oh yes! I was thinking about them earlier. We should put the order in now if we want to even hope to get them on time! Oh, must we invite the Potters?"

Hermione shrugged. "Right now, I don't think even Molly would kick up a fuss about it after the debacle today."

Even Scorpius got into it. "Can Uncle Ron have a twenty tire cake?!"

Narcissa nodded without missing a beat. "Of course, precious! After all, the Potters had a three tier-it's tier by the way, love, not tire- cake. And I do so love it when the green monster of jealousy rears its head in Mrs. Potter's eyes."

Hermione grinned, eyes gleaming. "What a _delicious_ idea!"

Draco looked to be considering something. "Do you think Gabrielle would prefer her honeymoon to be a six month cruise in the Caribbean, or a six month world tour?"

Ron could only gape at the lot of them.

He turned to Lucius. "I never had a bloody chance, did I?"

Lucius smirked. "Not a one."

 **AN: Brownie points to anyone who spotted my semi-subtle nod to LittleWolfLOVER. Except Wolf Blossom; she and I share a brain and therefore she's disqualified. Whew! Finally done! This has literally been sitting on my computer for the last year. And Wolf Blossom restarting her writing gave me the kick I needed to get these last two-ish pages out. Hooray for figuring out where to end your story! Hopefully there's more stories to come soon.**

 **As always, Read and Review!**


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